RealiTV Reality TV Podcast
90 Day Fiance, Sister Wives, Married at First Sight & 60 Days In

90 Day Fiance, Sister Wives, Married at First Sight & 60 Days In

February 20, 2020

It’s 90 Day Fiance Tell All time. Two nights for Angela to turn into a pumpkin & for Mursel to turn into my favorite childhood character, but my dreams were dashed. So close! I call on my 60 Days In (24:35) expertise to give you a play-by-play of the shiv/shank/fire fight. What a time to be alive, people! 

Over on Sister Wives (36:50), we get to see Jenelle’s dated carpet & drapes, ahem, before Kody makes a desperate plea to build his Barbie Dream House SAC, I mean STAT. Speaking of speedy, Zach & Brandon couldn’t wait to get the hell out of Married at First Sight (44:40). Hold on, Pastor Cal will save the day! He removes his glasses slowly so what he says must be important. SUBSCRIBE, SHARE & LEAVE A 5-STAR REVIEW!

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90 Day Fiance, Sister Wives & 60 Days In

90 Day Fiance, Sister Wives & 60 Days In

February 13, 2020

90 Day Fiancé is up first, just in time for Valentine’s Day! A day for love & last-minute Chardonnay from CVS. Unless of course you are Tania because she is a real planner. Her specialty is “creating an ambiance” so get your garden hose ready for a centerpiece, and Lysol for her sweaty crotch. I said what I said.

Speaking of stanky asses, 60 Days In (21:14) is back with crusty sheets and faces to be beat. You guys, I even made it rhyme. 5 Star Review on iTunes please! If you can’t do that, I’ll still love you more than Kody loves Meri on Sister Wives (33:55). Observe the curly creature drop the cheapest floral arrangement in Tan Mom’s lap before he’s trapped in her Lularoe grip… SUBSCRIBE, SHARE & LEAVE A 5-STAR REVIEW!

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Love After Lockup, Married at First Sight & 60 Days In

Love After Lockup, Married at First Sight & 60 Days In

February 6, 2020

I got myself caught up on blind items, a few People magazines & Demi Moore’s autobiography so get ready for a gossip-filled Patreon this week! 

This week’s Married at First Sight (3:48) has me all kinds of #triggered because #fitspo #influencer Zach, his #Coachella hat & his smug ass face really made me crabby. Speaking of crabby, how about you clean up your beach, Westin Panama?!

Don’t you dare ask Cheryl or her kid to clean anything up because she will lose it. Not her bonus tooth, just her shit. Love After Lockup (27:15) better provide therapy for the kids on this show because it was a rough week for the next generation. I think Shane may be even stealing backpacks from Lacey’s kids. Have you seen 21 year olds sport a Bubble Guppies backpack before? I told you so!

Over on 60 Days In (44:10), the bitch is back! Jennifer needs a bra, but Ms. Williams needs an exorcism ASAP. Don’t you wonder what her name is? Yeah, I was too, so I did what I was born to do. I dove in the deep Google ;) SUBSCRIBE, SHARE & LEAVE A 5-STAR REVIEW!

Subscribe to my new podcast debuting soon… BOLD LIP HAPPY HOUR! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bold-lip-happy-hour/id1387310266

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90 Day Fiance, Married at First Sight & Sister Wives

90 Day Fiance, Married at First Sight & Sister Wives

January 30, 2020

I binged Netflix (and chips & salsa) all weekend and need to talk about it. Get yourself caught up on The Circle and Cheer because they’re going to be heavy on my mind & heart for the next few weeks. With the loss of 2 Real Housewives of Orange County, we need something to lift our spirits. Clearly I mean alcoholic spirits because CHEERS! Adios Tamra & Vicki!

For Better or THE WORST- ahem, Zach- Married at First Sight (12:45) is really bringing it this season. Two couples have already hit the skids on Day 3! Good thing the experts are there to guide & counsel the couples through these explosive fights. Jk. Dr. Pepper is at some ayahuasca retreat & Pastor Cal is busy mansplaining Dr. Phil.

Let’s head to the lands of love on 90 Fay Fiance (34:45)! Sasha shows his driving skills learned at Andrei’s School of Moldovan Road Rage & Turkey begs Mursel to GTFO back to Omaha. Meanwhile, Tania’s likability (and boobs) hit an all-time low while being a super edgy bride. Give me a second…had to retrieve my eyeballs from the back of my head.

Over on Sister Wives (54:22), Kody and his #MomSquad provide a free Learning Annex course on real estate! Invest the most money in any property Robyn lives in & wait for the others to leave, die, or divorce you so Areola & King Soloman inherit all the wet bars. *I did the math and determined their total profits from Kody’s Sac in Vegas too!

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Subscribe to my new podcast debuting soon… BOLD LIP HAPPY HOUR!

And be sure to check out my fav podcasts:

Moms & Murder

Date with Dateline

Dumb Gay Politics

Mile Marker 181

Say What She She

Sip & Shine

Amanda Loves to Hate Teen Mom

Blonde Unfiltered

Monster DC Sniper

Chasing Cosby

The Catch & Kill Podcast

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Treat your body the way it deserves. Check out RITUAL www.ritual.com/realitv & save 10% on your first THRTEE months!

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60 Days In, Love After Lockup & 90 Day Fiance

60 Days In, Love After Lockup & 90 Day Fiance

January 23, 2020

Are Pringles really worth it? Could you shower on a stage? These are the questions we must answer this week on A&E’s 60 Days In (0:00). This show has it all: fresh meat, bloody sheets, and a roommate named Rita. 

 

In going with the broken prison system theme, Love After Lockup (24:02)! Cheryl makes her first appearance of the season and she’s really made a change. Let me be clear, I mean her clothes. She’s still batshit crazy & could fit a semi through her thigh gap.

You who else should be on this show? Clint & Tracie from 90 Day Fiancé (44:46)! They weren’t the only couple bringing in some dark energy to this show. I’ll argue Emily & Sasha could bring a gloomy Volgograd smog to any rose garden worldwide. I’ll forever stan Sister Emily! 

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Married at First Sight, 90 Day Fiance & Sister Wives

Married at First Sight, 90 Day Fiance & Sister Wives

January 16, 2020

Let’s start with the Casey Anthony case. Her parents gave an interview for an A&E special that should have gotten way more attention because it was ROUGH (and incredible). Also, “The Daily” podcast by the New York Times also released 2 episodes on Harvey Weinstein that you must listen to, and we also need to be on the look out for the new HBO doc McMillions. Now I want a Shamrock Shake.

First up, Married at First Sight (11:45) with 3 weddings this week! Let’s just say I didn’t WWJD this recap for one of the couples.

On 90 Day Fiance (30:33) Mike makes some Sequim panties drop while Tania demands Syngin to drop masticated apples into her pie hole. I would prefer he use a fist. Allegedly. Ok fine, a sock will do. 

No Sunday would be complete without Kody Brown and his Sister Wives (47:30). What is Meri to do when she needs the help from her family she brought into a Catfish scandal when she had an online affair? Who is supposed to carry all her fresh bananas up to her bedroom wet bar? I guess she is just the victim AGAIN. 

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Sister Wives & Love After Lockup Life After Lockup Premieres

Sister Wives & Love After Lockup Life After Lockup Premieres

January 9, 2020

I’m BACK! I’m saltier and chubbier than ever and loving life because we have SO MANY NEW SHOWS. I’ll fill you in on my near-paralyzation on a hoverboard, how I pissed off 90 Day Fiance Sasha and found Tania’s “school” in Costa Rica. Oh, and I also spent hours watching Don’t Fuck with Cats and binged an OLD reality show from the early 2000s. 

The we’re off to Flagstaff for Sister Wives (13:11)! Kody is trying out some new product for his tresses while Meri dances her LLR banana-print tunic back to Vegas. Of course, I had to see what’s up with Love After Lockup: Life After Lockup (35:47) because I needed to learn how to tie Lacey’s fallopian laces from the nice doctor who looks like she was missing her Lambchops puppet. 

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Prenups, Polygamy, Primonocta

Prenups, Polygamy, Primonocta

December 19, 2019

Good tidings of comfort and joy, my friends! I am an extra snarky ChrismaKwanKuhStice elf because SISTER WIVES (0:00) is coming back to TLC on January 5, 2020! Don’t you dare describe yourself as “not a fan” yet, because this season looks to be a game-changer. Meri is without her wet bar & she’s more pissed than that innocent banana she fellated. For Sister Wife virgins, you’re in luck because I am giving you a Sister Wives summary in 2ish minutes or less. 

 

I’m then joined by the ladies of 90 Day Slumber Party to chat about this week’s episode of 90 Day Fiance (8:30). Should Murcel have gone into dentistry? Does Juliana know more about the perineum than we realize? Is Sasha a believer in primonocta? Grab a jolly cocktail & listen up!

All I want for ChrismaKwanKuhStice if for you to SUBSCRIBE, SHARE & LEAVE A 5-STAR REVIEW!

 

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Miss(spelling) Alot A Lot

Miss(spelling) Alot A Lot

December 12, 2019

It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Also the time for a very important PSA about how to avoid being an asshole. Tis the Season!

Before diving into stupid soup with the jingle nuts on 90DF, I’ll share a few of my favorite shows premiering this week, ahem, Court Cam & The Profit. I may fantasize about one of the hosts while the other can eat a hamburger or 7. 

Hamburgers may have come in handy for that pathetic picnic Anna planned for her sons on 90 Day Fiance (18:52). Generic chips anyone? No wonder Joey hates his mom. Find out who deserves my non-redeemable Old Navy SuperCash and who needs to GO BACK TO SCHOOL FOR SPELLING AND GRAMMAR, TANIA!!!!!

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Remember to tune into Celeb News Ride Home podcast NOW, hosted with Cait Raft!

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Episode 165: Special Guest Hamilton’s Ebrin R. Stanley with Love After Lockup & 90 Day Fiance

Episode 165: Special Guest Hamilton’s Ebrin R. Stanley with Love After Lockup & 90 Day Fiance

December 5, 2019

I survived a grizzly-ISH encounter and I lived to tell you about it just in time to prepare for my favorite guest RealiTV has ever had. But first, 90 Day Fiance! Mursel triggered a nationwide OCD meltdown while Juliana shows her Daddy what a Sponge Bob is. Oh, and Emily shows us what NOT to wear after giving birth.

Who cares about all that because HAMILTON’s own Ebrin R. Stanley is here! Yep, the talented Mr. Mulligan & Madison (if your nasty) is here with me to break down Love After Lockup (30:53). Ebrin also answers a few of your Hamilton questions and shares his newest album, For the Lovers & the Heartbreakers. Guys & Gals, he’s the real deal and you’re going to love him!

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Follow Ebrin on Instagram & Twitter @Ebrinrstanley 

LINK to Ebrin’s latest album: https://music.apple.com/us/album/for-the-lovers-and-the-heartbreakers/1478796670

Head over to Thrive Causemetics! www.thrivecausemetics.com/realitv & use code REALITV

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Mr. Bojangles

Mr. Bojangles

November 21, 2019

I’ve been glued to The Impeachment Hearings & I have the reasons you should be too, no matter your politics. Trust me. I also dove into 2 documentaries this weekend that I highly recommend: Science Fair and The Devil Next Door. One will make you cry and the other will make you cry more. 

After drying my tears and considering it my cardio, I enjoyed a lovely episode of Love After Lockup (8:33). Angela gets her groove back and Lizzy reminds the world ONCE AGAIN that she is sexually active.

Another couple joined 90 Day Fiance (25:30) this week, which triggered a very serious and real lifelong nightmare of mine. No, not Angela & Mykul finding me and making me their surrogate like the aliens that kidnap you while you sleep, but the one & only Mr. Bojangles. Hold me.

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The Eiffel Shower

The Eiffel Shower

November 14, 2019

It’s official, I have become a person who throws parties for my dog. Let me fix that: a PAWty. I know, I know! Hear me out and you’ll get some planning tips and an incredible recipe (for humans). Besides making a fool of myself, I have been totally obsessed with The Mysterious Mr. Epstein and Bad Batch podcasts. A little shade thrown at a certain actress on The Morning Show and your binge-worthy list for the week is served up salty. 

On to Love After L:ockup (12:22) where Daniel really outdid himself. An Eiffel Shower proposal?! Well, what other rooms does the ritzy Destination Inn have in store? Oh, I’ll tell you as I explore the luxurious accommodations online with you. Meanwhile in ACTUAL destinations across the world on 90 Day Fiance (33:10), Mursel continues his Balki adventures across the Midwest. Emily comes down with a case of the Munchausen and Tania makes a good cause for why she should be deported out of NYC. 

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Chunk Up the Deuce

Chunk Up the Deuce

November 7, 2019

Let’s talk about it! Felicity Huffman sucks and RHOC Vicki goes incognito to sue Kelly Dodd. The Garner-Afflecks are nailing the consciously uncoupled thing, while Auj & Jer Rolloff might need to call Jenelle & Amber from Teen Mom with some special tips and tricks. 

Over on Love After Lockup (17:05), Glorietta walks into the wrong bridal shop thinking she’s on Say Yes to the Dress but Alex doesn’t care because he’s chunking deuces or some shit?? A new season of 90 Day Fiance (29:31) premiered and it is giving me life! Mursel is our generation’s Balki, and I am launching a search for Michael’s secret IMDB page. Help! Lastly, the kids on Unexpected (52:07)…well, they’re not that bad except for Matthew, Max, and McKayla who are the WORST!!

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Feeling God in Max & Erma’s Tonight

Feeling God in Max & Erma’s Tonight

October 29, 2019

Happy Worst Holiday of the Year! I am not Halloween’s biggest athletic supporter so I’m paying positivity forward in the form of an early podcast. It’s a treat, not a trick! See, even the jokes are lame.

Love After Lockup is getting all my lovin’ this week. That bread starter is still proofing in Amber’s jeans while Cheryl leaves a perfectly good club sandwich untouched. Unforgivable! Lizzy wants a basement baby, Glorietta’s mom pulls a Ramona Singer, and Shane feels God in Max & Erma’s. Or Lacey’s side boob. 

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Block All Cookies

Block All Cookies

October 24, 2019

It’s been a few weeks since I checked in with the kids on Unexpected (2:00) so what better time to check for dilation and effacement. What about Matthew’s face? You want to give it a one-two punch with Max’s? #MeToo

Moving on to some couples that may know my family members (ahem, Patreon), Love After Lockup (17:42) gave us a whopper of an episode. Amber begins to grow a base for Amish Friendship bread while Shane brings back MTV Spring Break ’92 vibes. 

Finally, the Lord’s day wouldn’t be blessed 90 Day Fiance Before the 90 Days (34:32). Can cakes be racist? Do cookies have reproductive rights? Let’s discuss… SUBSCRIBE, SHARE & LEAVE A 5-STAR REVIEW!

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